Here comes the Judge?


I got a call giving me less than 24 hours to appear in Court;

If I want to!

Now I’ve never been in court. Never had a traffic ticket. (Well, 40 years ago, I did get a parking citation the time I took my first long drive to my sisters university, and had to find somewhere to park.)

I am to appear there in the courtroom chamber to judge someone.

Here is the relevant caveat; I take part in an innovative Restorative Justice program that seeks to “judge” the whole setting of a violation, and not solely the act. In this paradigm, my decision will require my own judgement as to even my impacts upon the whole of the issue.

This collaborative justice approach not only promises to include family and other victims beyond the “perpetrator”, but determine the impacts of the event and the judicial process upon all involved, including the greater community. Recidivism regarding violations is dramatically reduced in this approach, while others are taken into consideration as to the effects of judgement and violation upon themselves. This is a holistic approach addressing the whole picture of harm.

This inclusive response means; less crime in our neighborhoods; more family healing, community influence on justice; continuing accountability of violators. Now the next best news; this greatly reduces the judicial system tax burden while improving the emotional climate of our neighborhoods. A way to “win-win” over something wrong.

I’ll be in court bright and early in the morning to hear the case and come to a decision.


Court is over, and the sentence has been rendered.

I cannot speak much about specifics and nothing regarding personal matters of the day.

The day started out very shaky, with much family anger. There seemed to be no hope for resolution, as issues and denials kept building.

We ended with complete consensus, along with the best possible outcome for this situation. It was an amazing transformation before our eyes, to see a family come together over so much of a problematic history.

The Restorative Justice response will run parallel, technically, with the regular punitive justice response. We follow the same time-lines as other verdicts, and violation will quite likely send the responsible party back into the traditional mode.
This family has many members volunteering to continue the restorative process off-line with the restorative creative process. That emerged as a particularly good outcome.


It might take me a day or so to recuperate from all the emotional intensity of today, so no telling what I may or may not blog about.

Hurray for being there for one another, instead of just doling out punishments.





Render human rights and justice irrelevant?

This question need be asked, since human consciousness is increasingly dominated by what is going on in the corporate world. Old organizations of law and order to protect the individual are atrophying, and being replaced by helpless and hapless citizens at the mercy of market manipulations. Speculation is turning the everyday commodities of life into the next potential gold rush. Those without their hands into these gold mines, becoming the ever new have not’s.

Just as trade agreements under the Clinton administration shipped good manufacturing jobs overseas, to be replaced by many lower paid ones in the service sectors, human rights embodied in the nature of the US Constitution are being shipped away. These are replaced by admonitions to become one of the ownership class or be left on the wayside. The cut tax ideology of death to the commons, is leaving the individual abandoned to their own devises (increasingly expensive at that), while corporations raise their price to cover cost while individuals are left with no such predominant right to exist. Politicians see the world as run by bigger and biggest business, and not whatever your personal concerns are, except to seduce you come election time.

Corporate theocracy, or market theology, the corporatocracy, are notions being forged to define trends of these emerging dominator paradigms. Along with the ever-present reprogramming of humankind’s identity interest by ad’s and ego based lack, the individual is left with little resource to truthful information as to the forces shaping their lives, along with their loss of control over them. We the People is a phrase becoming an anachronism. One of those quaint now “old world” concepts.

Politicians pander to these insecurities time and time again, some requiting constant fear to produce reactionary reptilian mindsets, and some promising community response where not much is likely to ensue, particularly with funds diverted to the ultra rich, which perhaps, a majority of a population would actually switch their lot in life for, they believe–the lottery’s.

These now institutionalized dementia’s are rendering the average citizen in the worlds increasingly irrelevant “democracies”, mere bystanders to the obliteration of their once held rights and human based value system assumptions. We are becoming not just cogs in the machine, but the debris of corporate collateral damage, of building monstrous self guided economic machines for the benefit of the ultra wealthy. That citizens are allowed to exist at all is perhaps one increasing reason why some are willing to wipe the whole planet out, if they do not get things their own way.

We are becoming a species run by smiling and pseudo-enlightened misanthropes, who do not give much of a thought as to what happens to the rest of us, just give them their guarantees to continue with their “good life”. To service this separation anxiety delusion, it helps to have these types idolized in the corporate media’s, being that they know what serves their own interest.

This reprogramming of humankind into being a service class to serve the new Pharaohs and other oligarchs, with their corresponding class of fellow privileged living in their own worlds detached from the average world citizen, is much like an expanded class–the pharaohs, being proclaimed as just the way it is. Just the way God intended. And since they control the media’s overall, they define perceptions of what reality is in the outside and inside worlds of conceptual comprehension.

The delusion of it all is, that the world is and always was one. All of this conquering and separating, all the hoarding and attempts at domination are all sure to collapse under the common sun. The potentially irreversible problem we all face is; as global warming may well render whole areas of earth unsuitable for large populations, along with mass migrations, just on this one subject we are running up to a wall, while pointing fingers. The multiplied stupidity of greed and fear based mindsets may press and stress the life supporting systems of spaceship earth beyond all containment. Once this space capsule is breached, exactly where do you think you are going?

This imposing, or imposed upon us all suicide pact being fashioned by the corporate world and its separation based delusional mental paradigms, is its own kind of Jonestown (1978 cult suicide event in northwest Guyana) . The true believers telling the rest of us we just have to be this way, there is nothing else to do. And there is that legion of blind sycophants, pushing the corporate world view as the one road to success. It is a success over drinking the prepared mix, then hoping for a painless end. Wake up soon, or you will be put to sleep one way or another.

It is up to each one of us to untie the strings of separation ideologies trying to drown our sense of community contract in the “bathtub”. Not all of these self serving delusions are of what we can think of as a consciously organised conspiracy to enslave us. They will, however, end up doing the same. They will bind us to a terminal fate for life on earth with their cancerous competition until resources expire, or the ill will generated by that competition will induce men to follow out their fight to the death suicide programing. Only love will produce that light at the end of this tunnel. Who exactly will give that to you? It is you.


Oh girl!


You go girl?


Today it made the news. On a cable news show, a female reporter mentioned that she was told that the women coming out for Obama can expect to not be supported by womens groups next time they need it. The reporter said she said, or wondered to herself; Really? Is that really true?

It is a stunning question. One that in a way goes to the very heart of democracy and prejudice.

Anyone who votes their personal hereditary bias, instead of qualifications, or vision, or ability to inspire, or who seems to know how the world works rightly from wrongly, anyone who decides by personal identity bias instead, is a fool at best.

I cannot imagine as a man, only voting for men because they are like me, and women some kind of mystery beyond understanding. Men are responsible for most of the destruction and misery on earth on a large scale.

Having said that; I am not a fool to vote for the first most viable woman to come along, especially when she may seem a bit like the Jekyll and Hyde conservatives in her tactics. Margaret Thatcher was not an automatic improvement. But to then try to blackmail others if they do not support your bias, no matter what kind it is, is anti-democratic to the very root. That is democratic as in Democracy.


The form of bias bribery, by force of support, may seem legitimate to manipulators trying to rig the system to their own interest, but it is a dominator paradigm just the same. Diving the nation by type casting may seem appealing to those who have felt themselves disenfranchised, but to do that by the means of manipulation is an overt deception.

Do we recognize the historical situation we are in? Are we seeking the best for all the people in our decisions, or just my cause? If it is the latter, I expect democracy to continue to atrophy until it is a mere figment of history.





I like the cactus, its often lovely flowers, as a red-orange flame on top. It exist in this harsh desert environment, partly because of its thorns. Thorns of a sort protects most water caring individual cactus, from being plundered to death and extinction. Most all cactus fruit are edible

The current allegedly endless war on terror, is said to be necessary by conservatives of a sorts, because our opponents wish to plunder us and do away with such liberalism’s we enjoy. To do this endless job, we need, the argument goes, to draw back our freedoms (to defend them) and retreat into a quasi authoritarian state. Limit our freedoms, put them into conservative ideological hands, to save them from the enemy that hates them.

Liberals and libertarians who suggest that this is throwing the baby out with the bath-water are called terrorist appeasers. The most popular analogy conservatives of the pre-emptive force type offer, is how certain historical figures did not oppose the Nazis as they rose to power. Point taken, but taken to where?


The Nazis used this very reasoning; developing a superiority complex ideology, targeting Jews and many others as the devil (evil), then pre-emptively attacking all who oppose them. But here comes my real point about points on cactus or bayonets.

The values we cherish under the umbrella of freedom, were not handed to us through history by the good will of the Hitlers, Stalin’s, or Mao’s of this world. They had to be convinced we would not forever live under authoritarian tyranny. Most all of us have some ancestor or know of someone who is putting down their lives to stand against the will of one, by living as a thorn for the will of all.

Forces in the world that control social and economic interest, are attempting to place their own barbs, on challenge to their sometimes invisibly imposed authority. They wish, for whatever reason, to hoard life to themselves. They are reactionary in that respect, against the will of the whole, against the liberalism of Christ, the Constitution, the Bill of Rights. They count on us to be spineless; to be pointless, to meander in a make nice mentality, where our own fear of defending freedom and self responsibility, for the illusion of stability, surrenders it.


Vibrant democracy, as vibrant discourse, can handle strong emotion. Freedom requires both expression of idea and need, and the will to keep it in the face or eroding “reasons”, that will leave a canyon between various aspects of the whole population.

Some may wish to live in a cult like atmosphere where no-one expresses their fears; where no-one shouts; I am hurt!; where no-one says you are taking from me and denying it by words and deed. The far rights vitriolic fear machine has many crouched in a corner, fearing a conflict if they stand up for truth and justice, or just a different point of view to theirs. They have done this even to the point of threatening to send their own private army to your door, oh dissenting one.

I can see the feeling to avoid conflict. Many of us would rather live in peace than conflict. I certainly would, but not by ignoring the truth that I know and must express freely. Many, as Hitler rose to power; thought their friends and neighbors would surely not turn against them. But many, by fears manipulation to survival, did.

I hardly believe freedom and responsibility are achieved and preserved without strong emotion. I see no evidence of this but in cults. Where the surrender of ones own will to the cults figure head, can hardly be called freedom or responsibility in any honest frame of reference. Democracy and freedom require vibrant debate, but they also then require extended respect, not threats to ones own freedom to express.


The far left and the far right end up at the same place–pre-emptive attack on the whole to preserve their ideological purity. Big idea differences but hardly any difference in behavior. Harm becomes a “good” to place on those other than yourself and tribe identity.

I am OK with those who sit out the pointed needs of our collective freedoms and responsibilities because they cannot take (or reject) the occasional pin point to their ego or identity. They are either ruled by fear, or absolute Good.  And who am I to decide.

But those of us who debate and show some underlying respect; that we allow differing ideals, ideas and opinion, that we, as they once said; “I disagree with you to the core, but will give my life to defend your freedom to express your beliefs.” If this be our stance, then we will maintain democracies blessing. But if out of fear we say; “Sure. Take it all a way. Just leave me safe.” Then democracy will be taken down in the desert of humankind’s opportunist ability to be, cruel and unjust.

I live for the day humankind puts understanding before fear, places compassion and empathy before insecurity interest. But until that day of love and peace flowers, as it one day must if we are to survive, its fruits will not be known unless the path to understanding remains protected.


There is that illusion in youth that one is immortal if healthy. Years take an eternity to go by. I remember once hearing a boy say, his friend with him is an old friend of his; they knew each other 9 months.

We stretch our limits physically; how fast can I run, jump, climb, at least many boys do. Girls have some of their own physical feats; sometimes like the boys, or other games, jump-rope, hop-scotch(?), even tumbling and other daring doo’s, that boys might rather not be “shown up” at.

I first hurt my neck when 5 or so, secretly. When 16, I was knocked out after catching a football in a parking lot. I went over the roof of a car and landed on my head. Being “out” was curious, being that I was in a black void, wondering how I find myself, looking for my senses. There was nothing but a desperate search. Things started to turn on in strange ways, hearing in color, until everything snapped into place and you could use your muscles.

I first hurt my lower back when diving off of a high dive while I was recovering from “walking pneumonia”. It was a bad choice to go to that pool, but my older cousin invited me and I hardly ever went anywhere for fun. I loved bounding off the end of the board as high as I could.

In my early twenties was the first time my lower back “snapped” when I picked up a dropped fork, (after the prior days digging up and turning over of the whole back yard in California, huge clay chunks, some prob. one and one half by two feet thick), leaving me with those ten days of no improvement, can not lift much of anything. It is a struggle to get out of bed, then have to walk like a stick not allowing any leaning forward or backwards, or sideways.

In about 3 weeks I was back to normal, but never the same, since that crippling extreme has happened half a dozen times in my life fully, and dozens more in a milder one week recovery way. Now I can usually tell how I get into this situation and try to stop what I am doing before that. That is then only a day or two of back swelling, sweating, or stiffness. Unfortunately, the neck and lower back are connected. I most always have to not bend my head when getting into cars, or the lower back might pop.

Later in life, I went on to work in construction. sometimes doing strange stunts like carrying a five eighths thick four by twelve foot sheet of sheet-rock balanced on the middle of my head to install it up on scaffolds onto a businesses ceiling. What a pain; balancing, aligning to edges, trying to use a hand to put a screw, or start a nail with.

I did this once to get our half hour lunch ended, since no “boss” was there and guys were still talking 40 min later, lounging on the floor. I was hired to work as I promised, so I did. Usually that would wake the others up from their mid day vacation. That is how I have been; I will sacrifice myself to achieve some promised ends in the face of difficulty, even if others sit by watching.

In my late thirties, as the main “clerk” in a huge warehouse in Tucson, I might lift and carry from 50,000 to 100,000 lbs. of boxed cotton goods (boxes often 80-115lbs) in one not so unusual day. All for about 1 dollar over minimum wage. My back went out once big time there. I told the manager, who then put me on another detail. I could feel my back leaking inside. In about an hour I could not hold my hands up in front of me without extreme pain. That started a 3 week no party of a vacation.

By my mid fifties; carrying a three quarter inch think sheet of MDF board (4′-8′) on my head to get it into my narrow trucks camper top and gate opening got more and more difficult. After several of these my neck seems no longer what it was. Now I cannot use it at all for a prop post.

Moral of the story being that; depending on use, some parts of your body can suffer from experiences at an early age, or leave you with a surprise chronic pain later. In case all you athletes thinking the possible thrilling abuse will not be met again later as the aging surprise. Surprise! There are birthday surprises that may be coming to a body near you. A gift that keeps on giving.


Throughout the culture we have some people using muscle and or being in positions that will have them regretting it later, but for many, that job was what they could get, and they might even become loyal to it, to their later detriment. The culture requires this work to be done.

These people may not have the ability to pay for health care. If you do not believe society (which depends for its existence on these people just as if they were the military) if you do not believe society owes them the decency for their service and sacrifice to it. Well you might be considered one off those heartless Darwinian conservatives, that are enlisted into Pavlovian response come election time, to blame the physical effects on the decisions of the one who sacrificed themselves; because it was their choice! Not only that. But why should I then offer anything to those suffering individuals since I knew better; was hereditary endowed (physically or monetarily), avoided hard work or difficult military service. We see this, the proud and righteous anti tax perception, promoted by predatory opportunist, as a moral value in the society. Down with the Nanny State!

This is an example how the greediness endemic to the alienated-separated individual, can be used to pivot their perception from full life connection, to defending oneself from responsibility to the whole. If one is kept in the perception of economic stress and or ego non accountability to other parts of society, which constitute the whole, I can think I am standing up for moral self accountability BY NOT ACKNOWLEDGING OR RETURNING THE SACRIFICE OTHERS HAVE GIVEN FOR MY OWN VERY LIFESTYLE AND PRIVILEGE TO BE PROTECTED AND CARED FOR IN THIS COUNTRY.

Imagine it. Conservative pundits right now as I type, are well paid to tell society that those homeless (yes, even from the military) living under bridges or a box in the alley, are mentally unfit and so beyond our province to help. That is the conservatives own mental illness of separation, often disguised as pride and moral, even spiritual superiority, to help shove someones life out of sight and out of mind. Their consciousness of the whole that is; amputated.

But this was to be a note on my life from yesterdays travels.

I avoid going to dentist and doctors, so yesterday was a special treat to see both.

Now from the doctor, I must make appointments for three specialist in differing fields. Isn’t that special. I also have another filling gone bad and have an appointment for that one. I did not know I was going to be getting x-rayed yesterday, so that was another surprise for the pocket book.

Gem Show

The tiny bit of the Tucson Gem and Mineral and Everything else Show one can see in two hours, was interesting in that there are many new kinds of stone and craft work suddenly all over, with an increasing shift, where I was at, towards Asian items.


The poetry reading was fun. I read the poems I have put on this site, which are in some strange ways different than my usual. I just write them and post them, sometimes going back and finding mistakes or awkwardness from the process of hurrying things on-line, or speaking to interest of my concept of who is writing poetry in general on my tags. Live and learn. That is what I have heard.

There were quite a number of newcomers to that reading, all seniors. Every writer is distinctly different. I sometimes enjoy particularly the straight forward from life ones from someones past, telling of some slice of life impression, fond or difficult memory. No fancy razzle dazzle word usage, just insight. Which is just so very much; a whole lot!

It is warming up an I am contemplating making a longer and less high dam on that small stream I mentioned many post back. The one with the one dam I already made last week. I often have to judge the price I will pay for lifting 94 pound bags of cement then walking sideways downhill with them. Plus all the mixing and shoveling.

Sometimes if a thing is to ever get done, you just go up to it, and do it.

From the nations last line.



Populations are best kept in a kind of stupor. Best kept there if you are wishing to use them for your own interest as a status quo hierarchy, no matter what kind of hierarchy; church, state, warlord, abused partner.

I wish the vision imbued in the constitution was allowed to expand. It was liberalism at its most manifest at the time. Immigrants to this nation were tired of abuse, tired of being downcast, sick and tired of being persecuted, or left with next to no possibility of personal development according to ones innate desires.

That very basic dream of being free drew us from far and wide, and as it so happened, we did not think much of those who were here, they were called savages or heathen and so virtually non human. Pushed to the side for freedom? No, for domination for one groups ideas of freedom, ideas which seemed to include indoctrinating the natives into the invaders ways, or simply locking them away on reservations after many a treaty broken. Broken due to the prime directive of opportunist advantage; because one could get away from it–not held to account. The dream of any dictatorship or human predator.

It is hard to be proud of some of our past. I am not a blame American first anybody to bring this up. Natives here as well as in Africa had slaves and often constant warfare. Some natives however, did establish relationships based on the Categorical Imperative, such as the Algonquin Federation, which deeply impressed our Founders and changed what this nation was to be.

Much of the world currently owes a great deal of its goods to the cheep labor in China. The once RED MENACE is now bailing the US out in that way, cheep goods, and by loaning us much. Is it smart business globalized, or is it more greed, that is both binding nations as never before, and finding wherever the cheapest labor is to make a good profit? Or am I just glad that my income still goes somewhere, not knowing it is at someone else’s lifeblood’s expense?

So far it seems most countries and individuals can be bought out of higher principles by simply offering them security and or a hoard of wealth. I grew up thinking that democracy somehow was that special guarantee that offer the individual a fair say, but I was young and easy to be mislead. Perhaps this is why cults, governments and related organizations that control minds, like many churches, strive to get their ideologies into you when you are little. Then you are imprinted and will require a supper nudge to wake you up to actual realities effecting individuals, humankind and the planet.

I grew up in an ancient established religion, and it was truthfulness that forced me out of it. Much later I was involved, and was a full time member of a more “enlightened” church that saw through the conflicting images of many religions to their generic core values, human values, even humanist values. They were aware that change happens in me first, that is where life and consciousness is.

If I require some unquestionable authority to instruct me on how I am to be, what guarantee is there that of the thousands of groups that believe they are the one true to you one, what likelihood is it that mine happens to be the right or truthful one? Inside the group you will always be told it is special and God given that you fortunately happen to have the right one. Praise whomever.

These group identities represent the core of conservatism; non compassion, empathy, or full understanding of other groups. That would seem self refuting to fully and truly consider your selves equally valid, so they may preach all these wonderful values, or just the threat of eternal damnation ones, but forgiveness and understanding is essentially relegated-gated to those of your own kind. This is a kind of identity retreat from universal humanity, to some, conserved notions of separation and probable isolation-superiority complex create a comfort illusion that you are protected from error, by not having intact critical thinking abilities.

I am not against conserving justice and responsibility minded values along with all the cultural ones we may be born into that celebrate both the joy of life and the sacred joy of being a part and parcel of Creation. These are universal unless short circuited when young or otherwise overridden by fear and insecurities that present the universe, world or others as intrinsically hostile.

I remind the reader that many on the left, or even liberal well intentioned, are not what they think they are. They may be their own kind of elitist, with no compassion for those they oppose. They in effect become conservatives of their own making; being reactionary to what they believe reactionary. I can view conservatism as a hyper-liberalism; where one assumes all manner of truths-untested as long as someone in alleged authority states it so. The USA is currently experiencing the hyper-liberalism of certain alleged conservative forces, who require no reality check on their proclamations. Now that is being liberal to the extreme; to the excess of ideology over any responsibility to objective truth finding. The conservatives (at least some of them) of the former Soviet Union are the—-Communist. All authoritarian-totalitarian ideologies of the left or right meet at the same means to the ends, with only their ideas, seeming in their own minds, to make the 180 degree world of illusionary difference.

Stand back and look at the world in its conflicts and you will see conservative turf battles at the cores of them. Most conflict is insecurity based, understandable, but not true understanding. The “enlightened” church I was part of could not honestly question itself. The individual was trapped into the new-age breaking of a mold, only to find that the same old molds were establishing themselves under new and unquestionable hierarchies. We all lose when we cannot question authority in a responsible manner.

Conservatism may find the facts to be only useful when they can be manipulated or cherry picked to suit their point of view, but in America in particular, this was not the common creed nor the contract citizens of a proclaimed free nation have in trusting that nations institutions.

Our new world of corporate citizenry, which seems to be now bearing down on the inherent interest of democracy, seems to be establishing a new level of feudal state. Some corporations are on guard to slay one another as if they were dragons, and if that proves an incapable act at present, they may seek to merger to eliminate the source of competition. ELIMINATE COMPETITION! Through all these bottom line wheeling and dealing, the commons of Creation is most often off the radar, and when it appears, called a false reflection. Pollution; acid rain, water table poison plumes, diminishing resources, national interest re defined as corporate interest but still called your interest and “way of life”. These all are to be ignored, like on the Wizard of OZ, don’t look behind the veil, the curtain of ignorance.

In the name of our highest aspirations of a just and peaceful world; with the rights of the individual to define themselves to their highest potential, yet remain responsible to the whole, these interest are being attacked by both government and religion varying place to place. What I would call the War to defeat Unconditional Love, is underway and well funded.

Opposed to the more or less unconscious movement of darkness over light, are what was once called “A Thousand Points of Light”, but I would call them actually, Six Billion Potential Points of Unconditional Illuminated Love. For whatever reason of which I was least expecting, I was once privy to a spiritual epiphany in the midst of great anger at my looming violent expectation. I tell you this because the scientific view many of us are raised on, assumes by its absence, that metaphysical or transcendental being is unverifiable by scientific method, and thus nonexistent.

This is a kind of folly, since it then assumes that the current state of rational thought as defined by Western Civilization is innately right, a foolish assumption given that we have mystery, love, awe, and a just plain thrill of exploratory revelation, that is part of both scientist and ministers conscious states of mind. Probably would not wish to live without them. The wedge of us versus them is ultimately a reduction of the potential of the self, if the us versus them is predicated on denying an understanding of the other, and not undoubtedly immanent threat to survival. But I remember someone said, and in so saying implied a higher and more powerful truth to; “turn the other cheek.” It is courage beyond belief, it is knowing the power and authority of Unconditional Love regardless of immediate outcome.

This is why I write this.