Vampires; The Most Boring Thing Ever


Well; Why Are Vampires The Most Boring Thing Ever?

{Next to bloggers that is.}


Well let me tell you. There are now vampires for every occasion and every demographic.

The age old associations of sex and violence take their most “romantic” turn with this sexy notion of someone giving you a lasting infectious infliction via seduction.  It doesn’t get any better than that!

I say this after seeing a car commercial having a vampire at the end.  I thought: time to drive a wooden stake trough my own heart.  This tired Vampire fantasy keeps sowing on new threads to attempt to seem original.  I feel for those who actually think the are vampires or like to pretend to be.  Whatever happened to real life?

Now we have vampire baby sitters, vampire nannies, vampire umpires, vampire chefs, vampire car mechanics, vampire doctors, vampire bankers.  Wait.  I think that last one is real.

I think that those in love with vampires and vampire mania should volunteer to have a big flourescent V tattooed on their foreheads, so the rest of us can know who to avoid in the day, and especially at night.

Seems these trends rely on the ever spongy young folks waiting on keeping up with trends to be original.  With little for or after sight, stuff like vampire slayers, ambiguous vampires, vampire counselors, vampire unions, and on and on; next to bloggers, hardy anything is more overdone and overwrought.

But vampire unions make perfectly good sence, since if you were a vampire astronomer, for instance, you would never want to be put on solar telescope duty.

Vampires do not need your blood.  They need a pacifier.



SciFi Channel Taken Over By Aliens: Now Syfy Channel

Friction Fiction

The SciFi Channel has been declared vanished.  Replacing it is the Syfy Channel.  Why? Y not?

It’s all about the y.

Syfy evidently was determined to be more cool.  Now it has entered the ranks of four letter words, but the hip nice kind, like nice, love or like, but not hate and other bad ones, although ones is kinda neutral.

Y is an ambiguous letter that can change its sound, in a sound shape shifting sort of way.  In short; it is the synce friction letter.  The minor y dangles to the left, as if it is going other places down the sentence, perhaps warping spacetime. That makes it a cutting edge letter, one not satisfied with just hanging around where it is, all stuffed up with status quo and all.  No! y is on the move.

In grammar school, I remember that vowels were A,E,I,O,U, and sometimes Y.  Sometimes Y! Y apparently has a mind of its own.  That should have been the first clue that it was not normal and could be suspect as an alien implant.  Well, that and maybe that clicking sound some ancient languages used.


By slimming SciFi down, the Syfy is more amble and able to be trademarked as one of a kind.  Going places where SciFi would have never gone before, is now as simple as py.  Wherever SciFi was, must now at least have the ciFi removed for the more petite, but surely fantasy geek awesome Syfy.  This will help create more jobs, quite possibly pulling the US out of its economic tar-pit, thus saving the home planet and the future of humanity as a space faring civilization.  We will survive the red giant attack!!!

Will this alien Syfy Channel still be populated by mostly 30 somethings with clear skin and eyes like dear in the headlights on most shows?  Surly not!  Imagine Greater my alien buds pods!  It will have old science fiction, where thin bearded men and women still debate whether the earth is flat and the center of the Universe.  What do you mean some folks still do?  Well lets put them on too, they qualify as aliens, I’m sure.

The new old science fiction channel will still see its plumbers chasing hair clods and ghost with only one night to spare.  Stargates will likely continue dialing up wrong numbers, or having aliens hack their way to our home planet.  Their vast superiority, defeated by the good luck and good looks of Stargate crews.  Only now one of the crew might wear an eye patch or something.

I await some curious shows; like one of aliens figuring out their alien lives on some alien world of their alien making.  Skip the always better humans, with their wiser that you ways.  How about a space based one, or inter-dimensional, where the aliens take we earthlings under their wings.  Babylon 5ish, only they look at us as goofy little daring darling kids with some maturing to do.  Now we could prance around in awe and wonder, but without all our usual hubris and earth-centric arrogance, as we watch in glee as the aliens use their cool toys and tricks.

Can I have some!


Wait.  This will be interesting to see. I’ll let you try it.  OK!  That’s enough! Maybe when you grow up a bit.

Note to selves; Do not!  I repeat; Do not allow humans to use consciousness exchange!

Awe!  Shucks!

Show canceled.

Time will tell whether loosing a letter proves to be an indicator of greater imagination or mere demographics.  For if you watch the old Twilight Zone episodes on Syfy, you will notice how little; pretty faces, fancy graphics, nor name changes can substitute for great storytelling.

Imagine Greater?  Imagine Greater Storytelling—-

You are still one of my favorite channels, whoever you are…

just another much ado about almost nothing post

SARAH. SARAH. Palin bounces off the ropes into corn field.


So you liberals thought ya had me down and out did ya. I don’t care what you elitist say of what I say. I’m talking to real Americans, not the kinds that love our enemies. I’ll have my witch doctor put those witches back in me if you don’t start being nice. Hey. By the way. How do I know they were cast out for sure? Oh! Yeah! Faith! I forgot. That liberal press sure knows how to confuse a gal I’ll tell ya!

That’s the trouble with this God loven’ country of ours; too many sinners have been put in charge. Well I’m gonna fix that for sure. Once that old guy caries me across the Oval Office threshold, it’s no holds bared for the American people. Finally God would have put one of them in charge. Real Christians, the kind that help the rich and tell the poor to act right. Ya know; like Jesus did. And let me tell ya, you sinners, we weren’t building all those detention camps in America for nothing. The Lord woks in mysterious ways, I tell ya! Praise the Lord.

All you sinners will be given the chance to repent. We all will believe in forgiveness as long as you agree with us. The best way to do that will be to be accepted by the Lord as your one and only personal savior. We know that when you register and vote Republican. It’s in the Bible I’m sure. God would not have missed such an important thing, but I’m sure those liberals will complain and whine about the God honest truth! That you can count on! As long as you prove you voted for me, you will get a personal photo of me at the poolside praying. I’d like you to have a memento of just who is on your side.

Once we get that sinner party out of the way, once again God will smile upon our wonderful country. And I must say; including far away places within the reach of Putin, like my Alaska. The whole great state of Alaska may not have the population of the Tucson Arizona area, but what it lacks in heat it makes up in with melting permafrost. I love slushies!

I’d like to invite you all up there to live near the oil wells once Kansas is a God forsaken hell hole. God’s gonna burn those people out of the lower 48 and send the God fearen’ folks up to God’s own country.

Some say that old man picked me out of spite or reckless disregard for our nation. Nonsense! He picked me so he could retire and let God take over. Real true Christians know this. They also know who they must vote for or else go to hell.

Thanks America for doing the right thing and not the politically motivated one. God loves ya. I feel His presence right now. Let me bless you all right here. God bless real America! Now that’s an order!


Before you all go. If you do come up to my Alaska, leave your witchcraft at the border. We have enough car accidents the way it is for heaven sake.

See ya…

nearly verbatim Tina Fey as Sarah Palin…

Tina Fey as Sarah Palin Video

Here is the one good thing left on SNL. Well. Compared to all the corporate show add parody’s where people look silly and stare a lot while they kinda ridicule each other consciously or via the viewer.

But here; Live and In Person, a fake but accurate portrayal of the Woman who would be King. Thanks to God!

Oh the embed refuse to work. Here is the link; Tina Few used Palin’s words nearly verbatim. Now that is scary.

Saturday Night Live – Couric / Palin Open – Video –

Gov. Palin and Katie Couric get real and adorable.

SNL Biden Palin Debate


Beatles Unite for Heavy Metal Fest in Tubac

Well this is as close as we get. First evidence of the Beatles playing heavy metal?

-large optical telescope on top of Santa Rita’s south east of town.